• Home
  • Blog
  • Contact
The Screaming Moderate

Don't call me Shirley...or sir

2/17/2022

3 Comments

 
One of moviedom's biggest comic contributions came from Airplane! when Ted Striker (Robert Hays) tells Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielson) "surely, you can't be serious." Rumack replies:

"I am serious - and don't call me Shirley."
 

No one's calling me Shirley but they are calling me "sir."

And I’m not liking it.

When I was younger, I called most everyone over a certain age, "sir". Just seemed appropriate and respectful, especially if I couldn’t remember his name. In fact over the weekend, I saw a fellow who’s older than me who I hadn’t seen in a while and, without thinking about it, I called him “sir.”

Now, I never called women of a certain age “ma’am,” but that’s another story.

It was bad enough when some 20-somethings at the golf course said to me, “Sir, you mind if we play through?” Or, “sir, are you waiting for someone to play with or can we tee off?”

That was hard enough to get past. But not the hardest. Lately, men in their 50’s and older call me sir. That’s hard to swallow, I have to be honest.

Clearly, you call someone “sir” mostly when you don’t know them or they are, well, of a certain age.

The thing is, and I’m guessing you may be this way, too, when I look in the mirror I don’t see grey hair. Honestly. It does come out grey in photos but I figure that’s just the way these camera phones take a picture.

But, I recently saw my uncle who is about to turn 90, bless him. Now, he didn’t call me sir but I hadn’t seen him in a while and the  first thing he said to me – the very first words out of his mouth – were “you’ve gotten white!” exclamation point not added, it was part of his sentence. And he wasn’t referring to my skin.

Not only do I not see grey hair in the mirror but I don’t feel 71 (soon to be 72). I still think I’m, well, young. Don't we all as we age? But I know that isn’t true.  Aches and pains that never ached or pained before, they’ve become more frequent.

And, the first thing I read every day is the obits in my home town paper, hoping I don’t see another classmate or childhood friend in them. Or me for that matter.

I see classmates passing. Athletes from high school passing. Names I hadn’t thought about in years. Names of people who probably barely noticed my existence in high school but I remember them. Hell, I’m reading about rock stars of my era who are turning 80! And still touring!

I’m the grandfather of six. My oldest daughter made me a granddad at 45. Skip a head 25 years and THAT grandson and his partner had a baby a year ago making me a GREAT-grandfather.

That hit me but what hit harder was it also made me the father of a grandmother.

Yeah, just call me "sir."


3 Comments
Shirley Gilhuly
2/18/2022 09:49:17 am

Enjoyable, funny blog. Know exactly plus what you are talking about.

Reply
Nick Lieder
2/25/2022 08:50:12 am

sending with the greatest respect...thank you Sir!

Hope all is well BJ and please keep writing...it makes my day when I see that 'Screaming Moderate' has a new post!

Reply
B. Jay
2/28/2022 08:26:41 am

Nick, you're far too kind but, thank you.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    RSS Feed

     
    Follow @bjaycooper

    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013

    B. Jay Cooper

    B. Jay is a former deputy White House press secretary to Presidents Reagan and George H.W. Bush. He also headed the communications offices at the Republican National Committee, U.S. Department of Commerce, and Yale University. He is a former reporter and is the retired deputy managing director of APCO Worldwide's Washington, D.C., office.
    He is the father of three daughters and grandfather of five boys and one girl. He lives in Marion, Mass.

powered by bjaycooper.com